Christmas felt a little different to me this year. not bad at all; in fact it was wonderful...but different. this year was the first time in 30 years i haven't spent Christmas with my brother. circumstances being what they are, it was for the best...but it was different. regardless of feeling the absence of my brother and his family, there were truly some great moments shared this Christmas.
here are the highlights....
spending time with my MIL
(that's mother-in-law to those who are challenged in texting lingo)
the past two holidays i have had the pleasure of getting to spend some one on one time with my MIL. most of the time when we come into town it's for such a short amount of time, so it is rare we get to spend a lot of time together. however, i really enjoyed the time we got to spend together this Christmas. it was really special to me. most of our time was spent in the kitchen, which was great. i learned a lot. you know someone who had to cook for 4 children...let alone one of those children being shane, the bottomless pit martin, knows a thing or two in the kitchen.
waiting on Santa to come
it has become a tradition for shane and i to head over to the other martin's house and help wait for santa to arrive with gifts for our niece and nephew. usually i'll help my SIL (see previous explanation) prepare brunch for the next day in the kitchen...which most of the time consists of me reading the recipe card to her and opening a bottle of wine, but we'll call that help. while we're doing that, the boys eagerly await for santa's arrival while watching the 24 hours of the movie a Christmas story. because of the adoption, this tradition had a different feel for both shane and i. it gave us something to really look forward to....and also a bit of a reality check. we need to savor being able to go to bed whenever and to wake up whenever. having a child means all of that will change. goodbye peaceful slumber...hello sleep depravity!! truly, it's a small price to pay and it will be a labor of love. i can't wait to be a zombie!!
DG
(i'm full of acronyms today)
DG is what we call shane's dad. unfortunately, we see shane's dad about once a year for a couple of hours. he lives in south florida (bless his poor heart) which makes seeing each other difficult. regardless, DG is always good for a big hearty laugh and a bear hug! he has had some health trouble this year and we are so thankful to God that he has been able to come through. it was great to see him even if it was only for a couple of hours.
the epic journey for rotel tomatoes
you know when you are craving something so bad and it feels like nothing else will satisfy? for me, that was sausage and cream cheese dip. what makes this dip so fabulous? rotel tomatoes. when did i get this brilliant idea? about 6 pm on Christmas night. oh yeah....something will be open. my poor, sweet, loving mother indulged her daughter's desire for cheese dip and thus the quest for rotel tomatoes began. we hit gas station after gas station. we had the door closed on us at walgreens. even wal-mart was closed. alas, it seemed cheese dip was not in the cards for us that night and we went home. while it seemed like a pointless, wild goose chase (which it was actually) i was able to make a great memory with my mother, which to me is priceless. by the way...we went to the grocery store the next day and my craving was satisfied.
a low country boil
on the 26th night we had a low country boil at my parent's house. my dad, who as of late has become a culinary genius (who knew), worked hard to put it all together. we had shrimp, crab, potatoes, corn...it was amazing. unfortunately, it was a little too much on the spicy side for mom, so we'll have to make sure to watch that in the future so she can enjoy too. needless to say, we were up to our elbows in yummy goodness. i had to take shane outside and hose him off. okay so that didn't happen, but only because it was too cold outside. the meal was rounded out by consuming mass quantities of pumpkin pie made by yours truly. it was a great meal and a great memory!
sorry for the length of this post. in fact if you are still reading this i'm very impressed because i'm really not that interesting. big hugs for caring this much about my life!! seriously, there were some great memories i have from this Christmas. i hope you made some wonderful memories with your family as well.
peace, love and Merry Christmas!
Tuesday, December 29, 2009
Friday, December 18, 2009
Biblical Friendships
friendships.
lately i have been terribly burdened by a relationship in my life. for a while i have had someone in my life that i considered a good friend. i valued this person's views on life, and God, and i really enjoyed spending time with this person and learning from them. i truly felt that we had developed a true friendship which is something so rare in this world. in the past few months this person has all but disappeared from my life. attempts at communication and attempts to get together are either not answered or brushed off. i've done some probing to see if there was something i had done to cause offense, but did not receive much of a response. i don't know if it is an out of sight out of mind kind of issue or if maybe, much to my dismay, what i thought was a good solid friendship was not perceived as such by this other party.
since this has occurred i have begun to wonder, as an adult, what is the purpose of our friendships and how far should we go to pursue friendships with those who do not reciprocate. as adults are our relationships with others like that old saying....some people are only in our lives for a certain period of time....or should we be expecting more from our friends and engaging more in our relationships with others? it seems to me, based upon how God made us and how He established the Church that He has the intention for us to be relational beings and to be in pursuit of others. i do have friendships in my life that have, so far, endured, giving evidence to the fact that we are truly made to be relational beings with lasting relationships.
however, at what point do you stop and say...enough. i've tried with this person, and they do not seem to want to share in a friendship with me any longer...for whatever the reason. it seems to me if we have not wronged this person, or at least it does not seem that we have wronged this person, then perhaps there does come a point where you let that person pass from your life and you move on to the next relationship. i think this is difficult for many of us to do, when we care deeply for them, have shared our lives with them, and especially when we are unsure of what caused the friendship to begin to fizzle out. for me, i also question whether it is biblical to simply stop pursuing the relationship. for now, all i know to do is be in prayer for this person and for myself, and to seek God's intentions.
i would love to hear any one's thoughts on this.
peace and love.
lately i have been terribly burdened by a relationship in my life. for a while i have had someone in my life that i considered a good friend. i valued this person's views on life, and God, and i really enjoyed spending time with this person and learning from them. i truly felt that we had developed a true friendship which is something so rare in this world. in the past few months this person has all but disappeared from my life. attempts at communication and attempts to get together are either not answered or brushed off. i've done some probing to see if there was something i had done to cause offense, but did not receive much of a response. i don't know if it is an out of sight out of mind kind of issue or if maybe, much to my dismay, what i thought was a good solid friendship was not perceived as such by this other party.
since this has occurred i have begun to wonder, as an adult, what is the purpose of our friendships and how far should we go to pursue friendships with those who do not reciprocate. as adults are our relationships with others like that old saying....some people are only in our lives for a certain period of time....or should we be expecting more from our friends and engaging more in our relationships with others? it seems to me, based upon how God made us and how He established the Church that He has the intention for us to be relational beings and to be in pursuit of others. i do have friendships in my life that have, so far, endured, giving evidence to the fact that we are truly made to be relational beings with lasting relationships.
however, at what point do you stop and say...enough. i've tried with this person, and they do not seem to want to share in a friendship with me any longer...for whatever the reason. it seems to me if we have not wronged this person, or at least it does not seem that we have wronged this person, then perhaps there does come a point where you let that person pass from your life and you move on to the next relationship. i think this is difficult for many of us to do, when we care deeply for them, have shared our lives with them, and especially when we are unsure of what caused the friendship to begin to fizzle out. for me, i also question whether it is biblical to simply stop pursuing the relationship. for now, all i know to do is be in prayer for this person and for myself, and to seek God's intentions.
i would love to hear any one's thoughts on this.
peace and love.
Sunday, December 6, 2009
Bucs Win, Bucs Win, Bucs Win!!!
Friday night the Hoover Bucs won the 2009 6A Football State Championship. Around here in the state of Alabama, this is like winning a national championship. Just like you have major accomplishments/awards in your workplace that carry heavy weight in your corner of the world, this one carries great weight in mine. Having said that, I reflect back on the season as it led up to this weekend. 16 straight Fridays of games and pep rallies and PR appearances etc... A 16 week season is an NFL season, four straight months of pressure and expectations. As I look back on that time, I am leveled by the commitment of my girls and their families to this cause.
I am also reflective on my attitude coming down the stretch. The last 3 weeks were terribly burdensome and I did not handle those weeks well. My frustration boiled over and my guard was constantly up as I had to perpetually defend my actions, some of these actions were controversial, including the dismissal of one of my seniors in the middle of the playoff run. Every Friday we won, brought more attacks on my decisions, as the stakes got higher and another win brought another "chance" for the dismissed cheerleader to cheer again, these fresh attacks renewed every Monday. I don't know how other jobs function in other industries, but in mine, personal attacks on your character, the undermining of your actions, and disrespect are common place from the parents. They feel they have the right to bash your character and get highly agitated if they are not given the forum and time in which to disrespect you. Maybe it is the old "I pay your salary" line that compels them or the simple fact that they can not deal with adversity or conflict, so they regress and the "Jerry Springer" comes out in them, I don't know.
Misguided as they may be, they seem to be fueled by lashing out hurtful statements and character bashing without evidence or logic.
Having said that, I return to the statement that I did not handle the last three weeks well. If I had to do all over again, I would carry out the same punishment the same way a 100 times repeated because what was done was done correctly. It is the aftermath that I could have handled better. The aftermath is where I failed. I allowed the attacks to alter my outlook. I grew frustrated with my cheerleaders, specifically those who need guidance and a loving hand the most.
Because of Christ, I am a better man than that, and in that light, I failed them.
Thankfully, we worship a loving and kind God that forgives and we are capable of change and improvement so I mentally press on looking for lessons learned and new skills taught.
In searching for that insight and explanation, I continue to reflect and this fact continues to surface: I can't explain it, but for whatever reason, I wanted this championship deseperately. Far more than the other 5 I have been a part of here at Hoover. Maybe it is because I grew weary, very weary this season and felt that there "better be a payoff that the end of this", or because the man that led us there, Coach Josh Niblett, is a Godly man of character and fortitude, and I wanted him to succeed on multiple levels. I don't know.
What I do know is the past is for learning, the present is for savoring, and the future is for improving. With God's dear grace, I can do that. Thank you Lord.
As I Remain,
Coach Martin
PS-I was so excited that I forgot to take victory pictures, so what you see are pictures before we started playing.
"Perfect Peace"
Isaiah 26: 3-4 states "you will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you. trust in the LORD forever, for the LORD, the LORD, is the Rock eternal. "
this verse was mentioned in church this morning and it has burdened my heart all day. it seems as though the Lord wanted me to hear this bit of scripture and for it to resonate in my heart and in my mind. now that we are officially waiting for the child the Lord has chosen for us, peace is something i have been longing for. as beautiful as adoption is, there are many things about it that can be cumbersome. mostly it's the longing in my heart for a child that is the most consuming part about this process. but in that longing i must trust in the Lord. my God is a loving God who knows both the desires of my heart and the pain that those desires can bring. this compassionate God promises perfect peace to those who trust in Him and in His plan. that is why this scripture is so meaningful to me right now.
i also have a very dear friend who is sharing in this journey with me. because i have not asked her permission to write about her i won't use her name, but she too is going through the adoption process and it has been so encouraging to have a partner to share this sometimes heavy load with. i mention this because i hope that when she reads this it will be an encouragement to her as well.
along with this scripture, laura story sang the song she wrote called "perfect peace" today and it was as if she saw into my soul and knew those were the words i needed to hear. i'm going to share the lyrics with you below.
to my dear friend who is sharing in this journey with me, i hope that these words will be an encouragement to you as well. thank you for being a thoughtful, loving and christian friend to me. i can only hope i have been as encouraging to you as you have been to me. as we walk through this together, let us remember these words and God's promise.
stay close by my side
keep your eyes on me
though this life is hard
i will give you perfect peace
in this time of trial
pain that no one sees
trust me when i say
that i will give you perfect peace
and you'll never walk alone
and you'll never be in need
though i may not calm the storms around you
you can hide in me
burdens that you bear
offer no relief
let me bear your load
cause i will give you perfect peace
stay close by my side
and you'll never walk alone
keep your eyes on me
and you will never be in need
though this life is hard
know that i will always give you perfect peace
i will give you perfect peace
-laura story
peace and love.
this verse was mentioned in church this morning and it has burdened my heart all day. it seems as though the Lord wanted me to hear this bit of scripture and for it to resonate in my heart and in my mind. now that we are officially waiting for the child the Lord has chosen for us, peace is something i have been longing for. as beautiful as adoption is, there are many things about it that can be cumbersome. mostly it's the longing in my heart for a child that is the most consuming part about this process. but in that longing i must trust in the Lord. my God is a loving God who knows both the desires of my heart and the pain that those desires can bring. this compassionate God promises perfect peace to those who trust in Him and in His plan. that is why this scripture is so meaningful to me right now.
i also have a very dear friend who is sharing in this journey with me. because i have not asked her permission to write about her i won't use her name, but she too is going through the adoption process and it has been so encouraging to have a partner to share this sometimes heavy load with. i mention this because i hope that when she reads this it will be an encouragement to her as well.
along with this scripture, laura story sang the song she wrote called "perfect peace" today and it was as if she saw into my soul and knew those were the words i needed to hear. i'm going to share the lyrics with you below.
to my dear friend who is sharing in this journey with me, i hope that these words will be an encouragement to you as well. thank you for being a thoughtful, loving and christian friend to me. i can only hope i have been as encouraging to you as you have been to me. as we walk through this together, let us remember these words and God's promise.
stay close by my side
keep your eyes on me
though this life is hard
i will give you perfect peace
in this time of trial
pain that no one sees
trust me when i say
that i will give you perfect peace
and you'll never walk alone
and you'll never be in need
though i may not calm the storms around you
you can hide in me
burdens that you bear
offer no relief
let me bear your load
cause i will give you perfect peace
stay close by my side
and you'll never walk alone
keep your eyes on me
and you will never be in need
though this life is hard
know that i will always give you perfect peace
i will give you perfect peace
-laura story
peace and love.
Subscribe to:
Posts (Atom)