4 on 4 Tag

my friend nikki tagged me on her blog. what you do is pick your 4th folder under your picture file on your computer, choose your 4th picture, post it and explain it. here goes...

this is obviously a strange picture what with elvis and his doggie impersonator driving through the streets of downtown birmingham in a convertible. this picture was from do dah day last may. for those of you who don't live here it is basically a big festival for dogs. this lovely individual and his dog were in the parade and we just had to take a picture. he is the king after all.

if you haven't done this already you are now tagged!!

peace and love.

That Spirit of Christmas

after finishing the last post about Christmas, i felt led to write another one about my true feelings regarding the holidays this year. for some reason i was never really able to get into the "Christmas spirit" this year. there are several things that could explain why the normal feelings of merriment escaped me this year; the loss of captain, a brutal year at work...but i really don't believe these things are the real issues that have caused a loss of joy for me this year. it seems as though there is this overwhelming sense of fear and doom among so many of us.

so many people i have talked to lately seem scared, angry and uncertain about the way things are today and very fearful of things to come. i must admit that i too have allowed my worldly circumstances and concerns overwhelm my mind and emotions to the point of dejection. it just makes me wonder, what is this dark cloud that seems to hang over so many of us, and more importantly why do we fear it? i have no answers for either of those questions, but in writing this blog one thing has been revealed to me. this is exactly why we celebrate the coming of Jesus.

before God sent his son we were doomed, and any feelings of despair were warranted. but Jesus came to save us from all of this. because of Jesus we all should be walking this earth in boldness and in peace, knowing our debt has been paid and we have been saved from all the brokenness and pain that this world leaves us with. this is what Christmas is all about.

writing this post has made me feel a little guilty about wasting my time on any feelings of uncertainty for the future and allowing those feelings to manifest into fear and despair. God is in control of all these things and i have salvation through Christ, therefore, from this point i will repent of my sin of doubt and move forward in boldness and peace. i am sorry that i missed this point during Christmas, but i will spend the following days in much prayer and celebration for the coming of our savior. if you have shared any of these feelings, i pray you will do the same.

oh come Emmanuel!!

peace and love.

Martin Christmas Carol

it is hard to believe that Christmas has come and gone already. the few days we spent with family was filled with good times and lots of memories. even milly made out like a bandit!! i hope all of you had a very restful and blessed Christmas as well. here are just a few pics for you to enjoy.

peace and love.

PROFOUND MEN. They speak for themselves.

"How smooth must be the language of the whites, when they can make right look like wrong, and wrong like right."

Little Pine

"I am a red man. If the Great Spirit had desired me to be a white man he would have made me so in the first place. He put in your heart certain wishes and plans, in my heart he put other and different desires. Each man is good in his sight. It is not necessary for Eagles to be Crows. We are poor..but we are free. No white man controls our footsteps. If we must die...we die defending our rights."

Red Cloud

"Out of the Indian approach to life there came a great freedom, an intense and absorbing respect for life, enriching faith in a Supreme Power, and principles of truth, honesty, generosity, equity, and brotherhood as a guide to mundane relations."
Black Elk


"I tell you somethin’ Bo, I sure do love this whole fam damily."
"It’s beginning to look a bunch like Christmas."
"The longer I live, the more I appreciate yall."
Robert "Captain" Logan


"Ambition is a dream with a V8 engine."
"Truth is like the sun. You can shut it out for a time, but it ain't goin' away."
"The Lord can give, and the Lord can take away. I might be herding sheep next year."
Elvis Presley


"No, I'm through with everything here. I want peace. I want to see if somewhere there isn't something left in life of charm and grace."
"Take a good look my dear. It's an historic moment you can tell your grandchildren about - how you watched the Old South fall"
"I've always thought a good lashing with a buggy whip would benefit you immensely."
"Now, Tom! What do you want to arrest him for? I've seen him drunker! I've seen you drunker! And you've seen me..."
Rhett Butler

"Captain, my religious belief teaches me to feel as safe in battle as in bed. God has fixed the time for my death. I do not concern myself about that."

Thomas "Stonewall" Jackson

"We failed, but in the good providence of God apparent failure often proves a blessing."
"My chief concern is to try to be an humble, earnest Christian."
"[T]here is no more dangerous experiment than that of undertaking to be one thing before a man's face and another behind his back."

General Robert E. Lee

“Life’s tough…….it’s even tougher if you’re stupid”
"Courage is being scared to death... and saddling up anyway."
"Tomorrow hopes we have learned something from yesterday."
John "The Duke" Wayne

"While living I want to live well."
"I cannot think that we are useless or God would not have created us. There is one God looking down on us all. We are all the children of one God."

Geronimo

championships and garages

Well, as you might have figured out by now, I am not much of a blogger, but my wife certainly is. I just had my first Friday night off in 16 weeks and it feels good. My mighty Bucs had a great year this year. the "experts" predicted us to go 5 and 5 and not make the playoffs, but the boys stepped up and made it back to Legion Field for the Championship game and finished the season 13-2. Our only two losses were to state championship teams (Camden Co. Ga and Prattville). That makes 8 championship games in 9 years with 5 trophies, not bad.

Anywho, life post-football season is good and I can finally post the Garage pics. I am such a simple man, I love my garage and I am so proud if it. It is 30ft by 24 ft with 10ft doors and a 15ft ceiling. Oh, just drink it in.

It's begining to look a lot like Christmas

well it is Christmas time around the martin house of madness again. i included some pictures of our enormous tree that shane adores. shane's favorite thing about decorating is interior and exterior illumination! for example, there are 900 lights on our tree...yes that is correct, i didn't mistakenly add another zero...there are 900 lights on our tree!! i must confess that i am married to a man who's apartment lights once made it on rick and bubba's top 10 list. our tastes on exterior lighting differs. i like classy white lights and shane's ideas resemble something that is a cross between the griswold family christmas and larry the cable guy. shane and i did, however, come to an agreement on our exterior lighting once we got married. we now call our house, the mullet. it is business in the front, party in the back.

here are some pictures of our tree and the front of the house. i also included pictures of a few of the homes in our neighborhood.

peace and love.

Husband Quiz

This is a fun husband game my friend Malerie put on her blog. She tagged all of us who are married so here goes...(hopefully I can remember everything!!)

1. Where did you meet? At Samford University at his fraternity house...and that is where we will leave this story!! :)

2. How long did you date? We "officially"dated for 4 years before we got married, but we were friends for 2 years prior to dating.

3. How long have you been married? 4 and a half years

4. What does he say that surprises you? "I need you..." Shane is a very strong minded and strong willed person. He keeps a lot of things he is thinking for feeling to himself so when he says "I need you" I know I better listen up.

5. What is your favorite feature of his? There are really too many to choose from. Everything about him is totally hot!!

6. What is your favorite quality of his? I love that Shane takes his role as a husband and a spiritual leader very seriously.

7. Does he have a nickname for you? Precious, bebe, sweet pea...I think that's about it.

8. What is his favorite color? Red.

9. What is his favorite food? My jambalaya, his mom's spaghetti, mcdonald's quarter-pounder.

10. What is his favorite sport? Georgia football.

11. When and where did you first kiss? This is a tough one because Shane and I remember our first kiss differently. One thing we do agree on is that it was in his apartment after we had been talking for hours. Whether I was sitting in the seat and he was on the floor, or vice versa, is a mystery!

12. What is your favorite thing to do as a couple? Laugh.

13. Do you have any children? Yes...Milly our dog. She may have four legs but she wakes up at 5:00 am and wants to go to the bathroom, eat and play...sounds like a baby to me.

14. Does he have a hidden talent? He doesn't think he can sing but he can.

15. How old is he? 35

16. Who said "I love you" first? I did, otherwise he still might not have said it. j/k. Those words were a little scary for him.

17. What is his favorite type of music? He like pretty much anything but rap.

18. What do you admire most about him? He will not compromise his integrity or his believes no matter what the cost may be.

19. Do you think he will read this? Probably.

I will continue the tag. If you're married and you're reading this...you're it!!

peace and love.

Thankful

thanksgiving this year was a really special time. shane and i were able to spend time with both families and it was so good to be with them. my uncle and my grandmother came in town for the occasion and we were so glad to see them. we were at shane's mom's house on thanksgiving day and had his grandmother's dressing which is always a treat. as you will see from the pictures we also celebrated shane's birthday. on a more somber note, it was our first holiday without captain. while difficult we took a moment to remember him but truly, he isn't that far away. he is always with us. enjoy the pictures!!

peace and love

Where is the Love?

lately i have really been taken aback by the lack of feeling and love that people have for each other in this world today. it seems as though people have become so selfish, so self-consumed, so full of disdain for anything that gets in the way of their personal agenda. we seem to be a nation that turns towards the dark and away from the light. it breaks my heart that in this world full of pain, sickness, poverty and brokenness i am often surrounded by those who will spit venom over the most meaningless and trivial nonsense.

i have recently heard a song by a band called the black eyed peas called "where is the love." while i don't agree with everything in this song, it speaks to this issue with our world. the following lyrics really speak to me.

Father, Father, Father help us

Send some guidance from above

'Cause people got me, got me questionin'

Where is the love

I feel the weight of the world on my shoulder

As I'm gettin' older, y'all, people gets colder

Most of us only care about money makin'

Selfishness got us followin' our wrong direction

Wrong information always shown by the media

Negative images is the main criteria

Infecting the young minds faster than bacteria

Kids wanna act like what they see in the cinema

Whatever happened to the values of humanity

Whatever happened to the fairness in equality

Instead in spreading love we're spreading animosity

Lack of understanding, leading lives away from unity

That's the reason why sometimes I'm feelin' under

That's the reason why sometimes I'm feelin' down

There's no wonder why sometimes I'm feelin' under

Gotta keep my faith alive till love is found

People killin', people dyin'

Children hurt and you hear them cryin'

Can you practice what you preach
And would you turn the other cheek

Father, Father, Father help us

Send some guidance from above'

Cause people got me, got me questionin'

Where is the love (Love)

to me the wisest part of this song is asking for help from our Father above. He is the only one that can help heal and restore our nation.

peace and love

How Do You Say Goodbye?

loosing a loved one is something so difficult, so painful and so humbling for those left behind. we each deal with the loss in different ways and at different times based upon our beliefs and perceptions of life and death. having been faced with the loss of 3 different loved ones this year, i have begun to ponder how, as christians, we should say goodbye to each other. in such a difficult time in one's life it is often so hard to see past the grief that seems to come so naturally to us. however, if we are believers and our loved one is a believer should we spend so much time in despair? when saying our final goodbyes to our loved ones should we be shedding tears of heartache and despair or should we shed tears for our loss but in our hearts rejoice in knowing they have been restored in Christ. they are no longer sick, no longer hurting. they have fought the good fight. they have finished the race, and they have kept the faith. most importantly they are with someone who loves them more deeply and more perfectly than we could ever dream. there is a great deal of comfort in that for me. i will admit that i am still not finished crying all my tears for captain, and i probably never will be. when someone fills your heart the way he did mine, it is hard not to continue mourn his memory. but the Lord blessed me through captain and i should turn those tears to praise to God for captain's life and how it changed me.

this brings me back to my original question though. how should we say goodbye to each other? do we have solemn services or celebrations of life? it is such a difficult question to answer and truly it is one that everyone has to reconcile within themselves.

for me, i ask that should the Lord call me home before i grow old and gray, please celebrate my returning to the Lord. let your tears of sorrow be few and remember me with a smile. for if my heart is at peace, let it be well with your soul.

peace and love.

You Say It's Your Birthday

we had a great time this weekend celebrating shane's 35th birthday. it was good timing to have something to be happy about coming off the loss of our beloved captain. the whole family has been struggling with sorrowful hearts for a few weeks so we needed something to smile about. we celebrated on saturday night because sunday was going to be busy. shane opened his presents and then we went to this great restaurant called firebirds. shane loves the way they do their steaks. considering his love for meat this should not come as a shock to anyone. we were there a good 2 and a half hours just having great conversation and enjoying each other. upon finishing dinner i told shane, more like ordered, that he must have about a hundred more birthdays. in all seriousness i hope he does because i treasure every day with him...and he will be a very good looking older man as well!!

peace and love

Friends??

i really feel like their are words out there that are overused so much that the immensity of their meanings have diminished. words like love, for example. "i love that shirt," "i love that restaurant." love has been attached to so many things that we almost need another word to express a true feeling like love. i know i am not the only person who believes that words like this are being overused, in fact i have many conversations about this topic with like-minded individuals. however, over the past few years i think i have discovered there is a new word that needs to be added to the overused word bank...friends.

i am begining to believe that all too often we use the word friend to describe someone who in fact, is not really a friend. i'm not saying that these people aren't good people or people that are difficult to get along with. on the contrary, these people are ones whom you can joke with and be amicable towards, however, are they really your friends? even people you "hang out" with on occassions, are they really your friends? as i began thinking about this i actually looked up the word friend in the dictionary, lame i know, but this dictionary describes a friend as "a person attached to another by feelings of affection or personal regard." it later describes friend as "rare." i also looked up other definitions of friends. "a true friend would be loyal not matter what the cost"..."someone to laugh, cry and feel with. they are an inspiration, a person who will lend a helping hand"..."a true friend stabs you in the front"... i thought that last one was funny. while all of these definitions of friends are good, i wanted to turn to the one place i knew would really tell me what a friend should be. "For the despairing man there should be kindness from his friends.." Job 6:14. "...a friend loves at all times..." Proverbs 17:17.

while reading all these definitions and thoughts about what it means to be and have "friends" i realized that we do in fact overuse the word friend. i think the dictionary was right, friends are rare, very rare. as i read the descriptions, especially from the bible i realized i haven't had very many real friends and more importantly, i haven't been a real friend to many people. we are all selfish, granted some are more consumed by it than others, but the true question is how can we actually become a friend to others? someone who loves unconditionally, no matter what the cost? that's a heavy load, but one that we should strive for and is totally worth it.

during the process of creating this post, the people who fit this definition have been placed in the forefront of my mind and sadly there is only a small number of them. over the next few days i'm going to tell those people how much i appreciate them being a true friend and i will spend the rest of my life asking God that he will help me be a real friend to others so i'm not just another person someone overuses that word for.

peace and love (and hopefully "friends")

Race for the Cure

"I have fought the good fight, I have finished the race, I have kept the faith."

this bible verse from timothy appeared on the back of my cheerleaders t-shirts for race for the cure this weekend. when thinking about what to put on the t-shirts i came across this verse and thought there couldn't be a more perfect verse for the occasion.

we are trying to make participating in the run an annual thing within our cheerleading program. breast cancer is something that affects everyone, but it is especially close to our hearts. not only has my mother been inflicted with this disease, but one of my cheerleaders lost her mother as a result of this cancer. while the girls were all smiles for the most part, there were still plenty of emotions hanging in the air that day. they announced that there was over 12,000 people registered to run that day. the mass of humanity that poured out that morning was enough to make anyone begin to get misty. as i began to look around at the survivors tent, i began to feel truly overwhelmed with thankfulness that my mother is a survivor and yet consumed with sorrow for this young teenage girl next to me who's mother wasn't.

i decided to run in the race this year, which was a feat itself. i am not a runner and needless to say my body is still telling me all about it today. nevertheless it was something i really wanted to do. as i was moving along and quickly growing weary, i just kept chanting that bible verse over and over through my head. then i would think about mom and then silently pray that it would never be my daughter running in this race for me. after about a mile and a half i was almost completely exhausted when i got an extra special boost. as i approached a church i began hearing a familiar and comforting voice. shane and about 40 of his cheerleaders were on the side walk cheering the runners on. as i approached shane began yelling words of encouragement directly at me and his girls all cheered really loud. i can not tell you what that did for my soul. coming to the end of the race was probably the worst part. i could see the finish line and yet everything in my body was screaming for me to stop. again, i began rattling off all the names of the women i knew had been struck by this disease and again i chanted the verse. even though i felt sick and weary after the race, inside it was one of the best feelings i have had in a long time, and again the emotions flooded in.

my mother is so precious to me and i did this for her first and foremost, however, we must realize that all women are precious and together we must fight this disease for our grandmothers, mothers, girlfriends, daughters, ourselves...all women. i just encourage all those who are either battling the disease themselves, or dealing with a loved one who is, to fight the good fight, finish the race and keep the faith. God is mighty to save.

peace and love.

Race for the Cure Pictures

Think Pink

this weekend was the annual susan g. komen race for the cure. in order to show our support, at the football game friday night, my cheerleaders donned pink ribbons and pink bandanas. even our lettermen painted up for the cause. i will write more about the race on saturday, but for now enjoy the pictures from friday night.

peace and love.

And Then There Were 3

it saddens me greatly to have to report that sophie returned to her foster mom sue. bless poor sophie's heart, she had such a rough beginning and seems to be having trouble getting past the anxiety caused by her beginnings. i could go through the issues we had with sophie, but the heart of the matter is that were never able to overcome her trust issues. while it is important to shane and i that our home remains a peaceful one, it was just as important, if not more important that sophie feel safe and comfortable, which she obviously didn't with us. even though letting her go was difficult, i am so at peace with the fact that she is back with sue. sue is an amazing individual that shane and i have had the pleasure of getting to know through this process. even though she is an alabama fan (which we are finding it in our hearts to forgive her for), she is truly an amazing spirit. she has such a love for animals and she was so wonderful about our returning sophie. so many organizations make you feel like you are a horrible person if you return an animal. sue made me feel so at ease and was so understanding that like many human relationships, sometime the chemistry is not right, or the timing is off. i'm just very thankful for sue and she has promised to keep in touch with us with regards to sophie so i will keep all of you up to date as well.

so...that leaves just us three. we really enjoyed being a family of 4 for however brief the time period was. for now the 3 musketeers will spend time being thankful for each blessed moment together and will always be sending out happy prayers and thoughts for our precious sophie, hoping and praying that she will be relieved of the issues that plague her. find peace little one, there's no need to be afraid anymore.

peace and love.

And Sophie makes 4

shane and i are proud to announce the new addition to our family...a beautiful new baby girl...dog. sorry for those of you who were hoping for something a little more human like. yes, shane and i decided to get another puppy. sophie is a 9 month old moutain cur, whippet mix. we found her on petfinder.com (a website everyone looking for a dog should check out) and she seemed perfect for our family. sue from the C.A.A.W.A, whom we love by the way, was gracious enough to bring her down to see if she would work for us. while sophie hasn't immediately warmed up to shane and i, she and milly have become fast friends and that is what is truly important. so thank you sue and C.A.A.W.A. for bringing us our newest family member. we promise to give her more love than you could imagine!! here are some pictures of our girls!

peace and love.

Oh Captain, My Captain

this saturday shane and i went to atlanta to celebrate his grandfather's 92nd birthday as well as his twin sister's 31st birthdays! it was so good to see his family. the family calls shane's grandfather captain, i'm assuming because of his service in the war and in the civil air patrol. funny...i've never really asked an explanation for that. guess i should. we also had the pleasure of seeing shane's dad who lives in cape coral, florida (no, we're not jealous at all) and whom we don't get to see that often. it truly was a special time to be with everyone.

shane's whole family is really special to me. i am so thankful that God has blessed me with such a wonderful 2nd family. truly, i could not have asked for a more Godly and loving family to become a part of. captain, especially, has really filled a void in my life. my mother's father, whom i adored and still do to this day, passed away when i was in middle school and my father's father is still alive, but i don't have much interaction. captain has become the missing patriarch in my life and i will forever be thankful to him for being such an openly loving, christian example to my husband and to me. shane is a better man because of captain and i know i'm a better person just for knowing captain much less being loved by him. i have personally seen the influence captain has had on his family and many, many other individuals he has crossed paths with. i hope he knows the difference he has made in so many lives. i've often wondered where he hides his wings.

enjoy the pictures and be blessed...i sure am!!

peace and love.

Martin vs. Martin '08

the week of trash talking finally came to an end last friday night as martin vs. martin '08 ended in yet another hoover buc victory. the patriots did, however, make the first touchdown and held their own against the hoover bucs for most of the game.

while it's true there was football being played in the stadium that night, we all know where the true competition was going on...the sidelines!! martin's patriot cheerleaders went head to head against martin's buc cheerleaders that friday night. heal stretches were being fulled down from, pyramids formed from out of no where, and pom pons were flying everywhere in this mother of all cheerleading show downs. who emerged the victor? well...as in any war is there ever truly a victor? both the martins decided to call a cease fire against the squads and sealed the deal with a kiss right there on the sidelines. to further show a measure of good will, both the coaches gave t-shirts to each member of both squads. the front of the shirt listed the two teams playing and the date. the back read..."it's all about the cheerleaders. brought to you by martin, inc." both squads seemed to like their conciliation prizes. fortunately, this event has been documented for the history books.

since martin vs. martin '08 has come to a close, life on marka street has returned to its more peaceful state. here's to martin vs. martin '09.

peace and love

Labor Day Moments

hello friends! this labor day weekend has brought some much rest for the martin family. i have been sick with a cold and shane has been running ragged so it was so good to just slow down and take time to enjoy each other. we spent most of saturday sleeping and sunday was a great day filled with church and lunch with some great people from church. sunday night was a really great time for us. we spent time enjoying the world of rhapsody.com where you can download different songs from the internet. it's amazing after 10 years of knowing each other, 4 of those being married, there are still things you learn about your spouse. shane introduced me to his fiery passion for the likes of muddy waters and other blues artists. i knew shane loved the blues, but i didn't know how educated he was on the topic. i in turn introduced him to the gloriousness that is van morrison and truly opened up about my closeted love for neil diamond. yes...i said neil diamond, what of it?? then, of course, we shared some moments and truly bad vocal renditions of songs we enjoyed from our childhoods like music from johnny cash, conway twitty and even a little buffett. shane about fell out of his chair at my vocal stylings of juice newton's "angel of the morning." by the way, isn't it totally inappropriate that i know that song now, not to mention from when i was a wee lass?? this evening we went outside with milly and shane taught me how to play lawn darts. i didn't know there was such a thing, but i have since been enlightened and very badly beaten. i am currently plotting my revenge. anyway, it's moments like those that i will remember forever. for me it's not always the big, elaborate moments in life that are the most special. it's the smaller ones like sharing your favorite tunes (very badly i must say) or being demolished in lawn darts by the one you love that makes life truly special. i hope your labor day weekend was filled with moments like mine.

peace and love.

"The Habits of Eagles"

"but those who hope in the Lord will renew their strength. they will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not grow faint." Isaiah 40:31

i never realized that the eagle was such a great symbol of the christian life until i recently read a book called A Time to Dance describing how one is a reflection of the other. i don't know how accurate the author's description of the habits of eagles is, but the imagery changed me regardless.

"the eagle is the only bird that doesn't run from trouble, instead it uses the storms to take it to a higher place." like an eagle, we can take the storms of life and allow the Father to work in our lives and come out on the other side stronger, wiser and changed.

eagles provide a model of a christian marriage. "when the female knows the male is interested, she leads him on a chase through the skies, swooping and diving and soaring high above the hills. when the chase is nearly over, she flies as high as she can and flips onto her back, free-falling toward the ground. it is the male's job to place his body over hers and grasp her talons, flapping his wings with all his might to keep her from certain death. moments before they hit the ground, the female pulls out of the dive and circles the male. because he had been willing to stay even unto death, he will have proven himself as a mate. the eagles are joined for life from that point on." in this passage the author alludes to the image of the husband loving his wife as Christ loved the church; a willingness to die for it. this beautiful image also shows what a couple should do when their marriage is in a downward spiral.

this last image is the most touching of all. i have kept this image close to my heart and think about it often. after my confessions blog, this image came to mind and i was reminded just how loving and sovereign God is and how He forgives all transgressions, heals all wounds and restores life to us again. "...the eagle allows the storm to take him to a higher place...the eagle finds a rock when he's in trouble and lets the sun cleanse him from any poison. the eagle doesn't flap around like the chickens and crows and sparrows. it waits patiently on the rock for the thermal currents, and only then does it take flight. not by its own effort, but by the effort of the wind beneath its wings."

Father, help me to be more like an eagle.

peace and love

See Below

Hey Yall, this is Shane.
Wow, I am so proud of my wife for being bold in her faith and following the scriptures. She is an inspiration to me. Following suit, I would like to confess my biggest sin. Pride. I think alot of myself and I think I can fix or take care of everything. I need to have more faith that the Lord takes care of things and that all good things come from Him. This pride also makes me unfairly judge others as having weaknesses. When I hear of someone struggling with something, my first reaction is: Suck it up. I need to realize that all of us have weaknesses and we all struggle, just not with the same things or in the same ways. Holly should be an inspiration to us all.

Confessions

"therefore confess your sins to each other and pray for each other so that you may be healed." James 5:16

this post is going to be a difficult one for me, however, this verse has been replaying in my mind for some time now. confessing ones sins is not an easy thing to do in our private time with God much less with other humans who, in some cases, can be judgemental. a while back our pastor discussed confessing our sins to one another. since then it is something that i have tried to do humbly and honestly with shane mostly. however, as of late i realized that is the easy way out. shane took vows with me and i know without a doubt never judges or betrays my spiritual shortcomings. after having this verse continue to find its way into my thoughts and also listening to my friend kevin talk about the importance of not "playing church" and posing as though we have our acts together because we are christians, i feel the need to confess my sins and ask for those who are willing to pray for me. this is obviously going to be a long post so feel free to read some, all or none of this post.

gossip. while i could blame this on the hen house that work can become, i allow myself to become a part of it and therefore it is something i need to repent for. just as James warns my tongue is a very foul and disgusting part of me and i wish with all my heart i could do a better job of controlling that evil thing. even though i know what i am doing is damaging in both an humanly and spiritual way, i find myself engaging in it often.

anger. ire in certain circumstances is permissible, however, typically my anger does not stem from those situations. i allow myself to generate anger because of my own selfishness (another sin) and instead of acting appropriately when this human emotion occurs, i can react with a hatefulness that is shameful. i can also hold onto this anger which creates another road block in my spiritual life.

false fronts/exaggerations. as ashamed as i am to admit it, i am not truly a humble person who is devoid of a desire to be recognized and praised. while i like to say i don't want those things, i do. i also some times implore exaggerations to lift myself up rather than exuding the perfect integrity Christ compels me to. in fact i am trying to be very careful that my intentions for writing these confessions does not become corrupted and become a means of selfish promotion.

comfort zone. i often say that i love others and i do, but only when, how and where i want to love them. truly, i don't want to love people if it is outside my comfort zone. it is really hard for me to go to extremes to show God's love to others. as of late i have been asking the Lord to move me from my idleness and to give me the boldness in Him that i lack.

disbelief. while i am confidently a believer of Christ, i am sometimes not a believer in Christ. for example, i some times carry the weight of my sins not to mention earthly burdens around with me constantly. with this i am really saying that God's love is not enough; God's power is not enough; God's grace is not enough. while i know that God's grace cleanses all my sins, i often can't let it go which demonstrates my disbelief in His transforming grace. this is the sin that hurts my heart the most. God freely pours His grace out upon me and yet i still don't completely accept or understand it.

while these are only a few of the multitude of sins i commit on a daily basis, they are the ones i struggle with the most. i ask that if you are still reading this that you pray for me. i am a horrible sinner who doesn't deserve it, but i need it all the same. please ask God to open my mind and my heart to Him and to break my heart for His cause and His kingdom. thanks for listening.

peace and love

Three mile runs, slip n slides, and bolting dawgs

Hey yall, this is shane. Summer has been fun and as always, it slipped by too fast. I had a hundred projects I wanted to do but only got to a couple. I am happy to say that i did get the backyard brush cleared and a 25 by 35ft slab poured for our soon to be "stand alone two bay garage". Pictures will follow as soon as I figure out how to get them off my phone and downloaded.
I finished my summer out with cheerleading boot camp. Three days (18 hours) of cheerleading. I closed boot camp out with taking the girls on a three mile run through some beautiful scenery and out into an old neighborhood with big yards. some cheer parents set up a slip n slide at the end of the run as a reward for the girls and it was needed because the heat index was 102 that day.
Of course, Coach Martin had to take a few runs down the slip n slide too. This included some races with my seniors.
That night, I am walking out to the garage and Milly squirts pass the door and my leg and bolts. I lunged to grab her and tripped over a car battery. I was sprawled out when I hit the concrete.

All of that is to stay that I might have blown out an ab muscle or two that day.
Good thing I am still 19 years old and recover quickly.

Thats all I got to say about that.

Back to School

well the summer has finally come to an end for the martin family. it's time for school again. shane began school last thursday and my first day will be monday. to be honest, i have never felt so unprepared to start the school year. i am teaching advanced placement european history for the first time this year and i don't feel as prepared as i should be. i attended an ap institute this summer which helped and there is a veteran teacher at school that i can talk to which does ease the nerves a bit. still, for some reason i don't feel the magic that i normally do at the beginning of the year. i'm not sure what to attribute that to, but i hope that it passes quickly. i'm hoping that once we get back into the swing of things my mojo will return. i hope all of you had a blessed summer and i look forward to hearing all about it. as summer finally closes i am comforted by one thought in particular....21 days until college football. GO DAWGS!! (Oh, and go Jackets too...sorry Captain).

peace and love

A Family Affair

this summer one of my cousins, elizabeth got married. it was a wonderful time for all the family to get together and reconnect. my grandmother made the comment that this wedding was the first time all the family had been together in a very long time. as such it was really special. i have posted some of the pictures below for those of you who know my family and would like to see them. i was blown away at how stunning my cousins are. they have all grown into beautiful women with beautiful hearts and i am so thankful for the time i got to spend with them. for those of you who know her my cousin rachael recently got engaged. we are very excited for her. her older sister laura was married in december 2006 and her twin sister robin, as well as rachael will be graduating college soon. it's hard to believe. also in attendance were all my aunts and uncles as well as my great aunt and her son barry whom i haven't seen since i was probably 7 or 8. it was just a really precious time. oh, and by the way...can you tell who shane's favorite family member?

peace and love.