as i'm writing this i'm trying my best not to have an anxious heart...
we have someone who is considering us for the placement of her child. this is absolutely nothing official, but it is a lead. i'm writing this to anyone who is reading to please pray for all of us. pray for this young woman who has a very big decision to make. pray for her heart and that she will look to the Father for guidance. please pray that she will have peace no matter what she decides to do. pray for her health and the health of the child. pray for shane and i...me especially since shane is much more emotionally solid. please pray that i will not be anxious, that i will have a submissive heart towards the Father and His will. please pray that the Father will give me the strength not to just endure the coming weeks, but rejoice in them and in the work that God is doing in all our lives through this experience.
thank you all for your thoughts, prayers and overwhelming support. i am truly blessed to have each of you in my life. i will continue to update you as we continue in the process.
peace and love.
Wednesday, September 30, 2009
Saturday, September 26, 2009
Opinion Time
getting my hair did today and need some suggestions...
long and blonde
short and red
long and red
short and blonde
bangs
no bangs
green and spiky (just kidding)
i need some help here.....
peace and love.
long and blonde
short and red
long and red
short and blonde
bangs
no bangs
green and spiky (just kidding)
i need some help here.....
peace and love.
Tuesday, September 22, 2009
I'm Lovin It
awhile back i wrote a blog about all the things that were annoying me at that time. in my quest to exude love and positive energy, i thought i would blog about the top 10 things i'm loving right now.
and here they are in no particular order.......
10. i'm loving how i have been spending the mornings lately.
shane is getting up earlier this year so we spend the morning getting ready together listening to praise songs via pandora. it's a great way to start the day.
9. i'm loving being a jv cheerleading coach.
i loved my varsity girls, but working with jv is so much more relaxing. i get to do the things i love about cheerleading without all the pressure that goes with running a program.
8. i love that my jv cheerleaders tell me they love me.
enough said on that one.
7. i love being 30.
the 20s were so full of confusion for me. at 30 i know what i want, what i love, whom i love and whom i'm living for, and that is a great feeling.
6. i love that i can now run 3 miles successfully.
to some this may not be a big deal, but if you had told me back in may that running would become a lifestyle for me i would have told you that you're crazy. it feels great to accomplish a goal.
5. i love my pastor and my gospel centered church.
words can not express how eternally grateful i am for bob flayhart and oak mountain presbyterian. because of the word that is being preached and the work being done in and through our church, i have found joy in my christian life again and now have a deeper understanding of the grace of God.
4. i love that the everyday, so called "mundane" is more enjoyable to me than the fantastic.
3. i love spending time with shane dreaming about the child the Lord has picked out for us.
this has become a favorite pastime around the martin house lately.
2. i love being self-aware
as hard as it can be to admit that i'm wrong, i do love the fact that i can step back from a situation and really assess what my motives are and whether my reactions are justified and resemble the actions of the person i say that i am.
1. i love living in the moment.
have you ever had a moment where you let go of everything in the past, forgot about the future and truly reveled in the moment? when i allow myself to do that, those moments come close to perfection, and i love to have the feeling that at that particular moment, there is no place i'd rather be.
those are my top 10 things i'm loving right now....what are yours?
peace and lots of things to love.
and here they are in no particular order.......
10. i'm loving how i have been spending the mornings lately.
shane is getting up earlier this year so we spend the morning getting ready together listening to praise songs via pandora. it's a great way to start the day.
9. i'm loving being a jv cheerleading coach.
i loved my varsity girls, but working with jv is so much more relaxing. i get to do the things i love about cheerleading without all the pressure that goes with running a program.
8. i love that my jv cheerleaders tell me they love me.
enough said on that one.
7. i love being 30.
the 20s were so full of confusion for me. at 30 i know what i want, what i love, whom i love and whom i'm living for, and that is a great feeling.
6. i love that i can now run 3 miles successfully.
to some this may not be a big deal, but if you had told me back in may that running would become a lifestyle for me i would have told you that you're crazy. it feels great to accomplish a goal.
5. i love my pastor and my gospel centered church.
words can not express how eternally grateful i am for bob flayhart and oak mountain presbyterian. because of the word that is being preached and the work being done in and through our church, i have found joy in my christian life again and now have a deeper understanding of the grace of God.
4. i love that the everyday, so called "mundane" is more enjoyable to me than the fantastic.
3. i love spending time with shane dreaming about the child the Lord has picked out for us.
this has become a favorite pastime around the martin house lately.
2. i love being self-aware
as hard as it can be to admit that i'm wrong, i do love the fact that i can step back from a situation and really assess what my motives are and whether my reactions are justified and resemble the actions of the person i say that i am.
1. i love living in the moment.
have you ever had a moment where you let go of everything in the past, forgot about the future and truly reveled in the moment? when i allow myself to do that, those moments come close to perfection, and i love to have the feeling that at that particular moment, there is no place i'd rather be.
those are my top 10 things i'm loving right now....what are yours?
peace and lots of things to love.
Saturday, September 5, 2009
Update
it has been one crazy ride the last few weeks, so i apologize once again for neglecting my blog. here's what's new in the martin house of madness....
i've officially been working in my new school for 3 weeks and i couldn't be happier. it's a whole new world. the people i work with are fabulous, i'm treated like a professional, and the kids are phenomenal. you know you've made the right decision when you are supposed to be having a meeting with some of the members of your department on your off period, and they take you to a mexican restaurant for lunch. that's right...i actually got to leave campus for lunch without having to sneak out, sign a sheet saying what time i'm leaving, where i'm going, what time i'll be back or needing an act of congress. it has truly been refreshing and i have once again regained my passion for teaching. granted it's only been a couple of weeks, but i am so thankful to be a part of such a wonderful system.
along those lines...we currently have about 10% of our student body out with the swine flu, and guess what lucky individual fell victim to this lovely illness...yours truly. yes i had the swine flu and while i did not grow a tail or pig ears, it did have me grunting in misery for about 5 days. let me also say that while most people would disagree with me, i think tamiflu is the devil. the side effects i had from this medicine quite possibly rivaled the illness itself. i won't go into the details as i do not want to scare any of you, but let's just say it was bad and i'm happy that whole mess is behind me. i'm hoping as we move into the cooler months that we will see the swine flu disappear.
we are getting to the final stages of the all the paper work we have to do for the adoption process. we received our background checks and, believe it or not, the FBI deemed shane suitable for adoption. guess they didn't find out about all his shenanigans as a frat boy. whew...that was a close one!! just kidding mom! now all we really lack is getting our physicals and health forms done. the unfortunate part about that is apparently the blood work and some of the tests we have to have done are not covered by our insurance and will subsequently cost us around $700. that is unless we can find a doctor willing to sign off for us that we do not have HIV or any random STD. ugh!! i just try to look at it as one more part of the journey.
it seems as though the closer we get to being eligible for adoption the more our desire to be parents is increasing. truly it has begun to consume our thoughts, our conversations and is constantly on our minds and hearts. in fact, we had a baptism a couple of weeks ago at church and i just lost it. right there in the middle of church i began to cry because my longing to be a mother has become painfully overwhelming. there are some issues with this feelings, however. eligibility does not mean we are going to have a child in a few months or even a few years. this process could drag on and on for who knows how long. secondly, and more importantly, why, why can i not seem to simply wait on the Lord when it comes to this situation?
i give waiting on the Lord lip service, i've even written blogs about it, but if i'm honest with myself i have to admit that when it comes to this i'm being extraordinarily impatient. even though i know my feelings are ridiculous and that having things my way will only bring pain and chaos, the desire a woman has to be a mother is a powerful thing. i never understood this power and how it controls the mind, the heart and the soul until now. Lord, i just ask forgiveness and peace for both myself and others that i know are sharing in this struggle with me. strengthen our faith and our resolve. let us count this journey you are taking us on as pure joy. take our desires and focus them on You and Your glory.
well...i believe that is all i have in the way of updates for now. i apologize for the length of the post. i hope some of you actually made it all the way through my ramblings.
peace and love.
i've officially been working in my new school for 3 weeks and i couldn't be happier. it's a whole new world. the people i work with are fabulous, i'm treated like a professional, and the kids are phenomenal. you know you've made the right decision when you are supposed to be having a meeting with some of the members of your department on your off period, and they take you to a mexican restaurant for lunch. that's right...i actually got to leave campus for lunch without having to sneak out, sign a sheet saying what time i'm leaving, where i'm going, what time i'll be back or needing an act of congress. it has truly been refreshing and i have once again regained my passion for teaching. granted it's only been a couple of weeks, but i am so thankful to be a part of such a wonderful system.
along those lines...we currently have about 10% of our student body out with the swine flu, and guess what lucky individual fell victim to this lovely illness...yours truly. yes i had the swine flu and while i did not grow a tail or pig ears, it did have me grunting in misery for about 5 days. let me also say that while most people would disagree with me, i think tamiflu is the devil. the side effects i had from this medicine quite possibly rivaled the illness itself. i won't go into the details as i do not want to scare any of you, but let's just say it was bad and i'm happy that whole mess is behind me. i'm hoping as we move into the cooler months that we will see the swine flu disappear.
we are getting to the final stages of the all the paper work we have to do for the adoption process. we received our background checks and, believe it or not, the FBI deemed shane suitable for adoption. guess they didn't find out about all his shenanigans as a frat boy. whew...that was a close one!! just kidding mom! now all we really lack is getting our physicals and health forms done. the unfortunate part about that is apparently the blood work and some of the tests we have to have done are not covered by our insurance and will subsequently cost us around $700. that is unless we can find a doctor willing to sign off for us that we do not have HIV or any random STD. ugh!! i just try to look at it as one more part of the journey.
it seems as though the closer we get to being eligible for adoption the more our desire to be parents is increasing. truly it has begun to consume our thoughts, our conversations and is constantly on our minds and hearts. in fact, we had a baptism a couple of weeks ago at church and i just lost it. right there in the middle of church i began to cry because my longing to be a mother has become painfully overwhelming. there are some issues with this feelings, however. eligibility does not mean we are going to have a child in a few months or even a few years. this process could drag on and on for who knows how long. secondly, and more importantly, why, why can i not seem to simply wait on the Lord when it comes to this situation?
i give waiting on the Lord lip service, i've even written blogs about it, but if i'm honest with myself i have to admit that when it comes to this i'm being extraordinarily impatient. even though i know my feelings are ridiculous and that having things my way will only bring pain and chaos, the desire a woman has to be a mother is a powerful thing. i never understood this power and how it controls the mind, the heart and the soul until now. Lord, i just ask forgiveness and peace for both myself and others that i know are sharing in this struggle with me. strengthen our faith and our resolve. let us count this journey you are taking us on as pure joy. take our desires and focus them on You and Your glory.
well...i believe that is all i have in the way of updates for now. i apologize for the length of the post. i hope some of you actually made it all the way through my ramblings.
peace and love.
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